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Friday, November 22, 2013

The best relationship?

I am a social media addict, I wake up everyday in the morning and reach for my phone. Few texts from friends that were sent over while I was asleep and then good morning text from my boyfriend.


I would just brush it off, and then proceed to check twitter, instagram and facebook. Such a bad habit that I have absolute no idea if I can kick it off. Digressing, my point of this entire entry is not to bore you with my daily morning routine. I am here to share my point of view of having the best relationship of your life.


Sometimes when I finish a task at my desk I will conveniently open a tab and log in to facebook, just because. And I see my friends sharing links on unbelievable stuff, exciting news, mind blowing facts, informative articles and the most shared - relationship advices. It goes from "10 tips for healthy relationship", "49 things guys wished girls knew", "what girls really want from they boyfriend" etc. You get my drift. And I always click on it to read. To be fair, some were really good points but most of them are just bullshit.


I am not a guru in love, neither am I qualified to give any advice. But I just need to say how I really feel about having the best relationship. There is no "10 tips" nor are there any "49 things to note". After being in several unpleasant relationships and landing myself in the best one ever currently, I learnt one thing. Just one, trust me.


1. Love your partner everyday like it was the first day

Remember your first date together? Replay that, everyday. Now you must be thinking I am mad, am I serious? Totally. No good relationship comes easy and effortlessly. 

I actually wanted to advise to love your partner like it was the last day, since you know we humans has this annoying trait in us that love to not express how much you love a person until you are on the verge of losing them. But no one can do it, because we haven't lose them to know how much we can love.

Instead, love them like it was the first day because you can remember everything.
How you made the effort to look good on the first date, how you listened to everything they have to say, how you made a little sacrifice to watch a certain movie you hate just to spend time with them, how you tease and made fun at each other without actually getting mad and the list goes on, you get what I mean.


And then comes the inevitable times where both of you end up in an heated argument. Don't worry, it happens. You just have to keep calm and figure if you still love your partner enough to work things out. Don't throw the 'breakup' word like it's nothing. Sure, you are angry but do not let your temporary emotion make permanent decision for you. Do not bring up the issue again once it has been resolved. Just don't. Women has a habit of doing that, I know. 

I don't do that anymore in my current relationship because I figured my boyfriend has more perfection than flaws and I have more happy moments than sad times when I am with him. And that, in the end, is what matter most.


We all have things we hate about our partners, like their annoying habits to the way they talk sometimes....I can make a list out of the things I dislike about my boyfriend. But instead on focusing everything about yourself, you have to consider that you aren't perfect too. 

I'm sure my boyfriend could also make a list of the things he dislike about me, but he didn't. So I don't. 


After 3 years with my current boyfriend, I still feel like we are in the honeymoon period because we love each other like the first day we got together. I remember playing and laughing hysterically in public with my boyfriend, kinda forgot the details on why we were behaving like crazy but we overheard a couple looking over and commenting something like "This two confirm just got together only"

I told my boyfriend about it and he smiled: "They are wrong, because I feel like I am still wooing you."


That was the moment I knew this is the guy I need to spend the rest of my life with. 



I am not sure if people reading this will understand what I have shared or will attack me with hurtful comments (I hope not) but I genuinely wish that this helps. I hope after reaching the end of this post, you guys could just pick up your phone to call/text your partner to say you love them. Random, but little things like that could go a long way :)


Lots of love,
Elaine






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