Mostly because, I admit, I am afraid. The fear is so overwhelming that sometimes I can't sleep, or I when I do, I wake up with a fearful mind. I am afraid that once I'm there, instructors will push us to our extreme and I might just snap and vent my anger on my team mates.
Or maybe, I can never be serious and when there are circumstances that requires me to do so, I am afraid that I can't, and my team mates will hate me for that.
No matter how much they talk about self-reliance and all, I think it what matters to me is our team as a whole. We are going to sail to Indonesia by ourselves. How much self-reliance can you derive from there?
There are thousands and one thing on my mind, but I have one minute left to post this entry before I fly out of my house to school because we are supposed to consume some kind of Malaria pill before going Indonesia.
I will be back, till then!